10-16-2008

Uncertainties are more about
making decisions
then having answers.

Steps of anxiety
are not the path of trust;
nor is worried waiting.

Waiting? Waiting for what:
an epiphany;
a secret message;
a whisper;
Time to get tired, throwing the towel;
hm?
you wait like a corpse,
like frozen,
like paralyzed, all waiting for movement,
not to move,
you Gnostic navel-gazer.

Anxiety affirms the acceptance of
the ‘if’ and of the ‘but;’
the wonder of the wonder
manifested in the inaction,
trusting not that the darkness is blinding
rather that it is death:
plaguing the insides,
consuming confusion,
leaving your naked faithlessness
. . . at least in the Promiser.

Take Some Time Sometimes

Today I took the long way
home is only so when I’m gone
again a season sets, gone as a grain
fields swindles away my upright shields
block out fake fortresses, prisons lock
load unhinged as breeze dances slow
dance again to rhythm of gladness.
The long way unwound a world of worry today.

Do You Mind

‘The earth is the Lord’s and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein’ (Psalm 24.1).

In an episode of the television show House, Dr. Gregory House is attempting to make a point to his assistant and fellow Alison Cameron. Her efforts to figure out if Dr. House accepted her into the program simply based on her natural physical attraction are relentless. Dr. House continues to raise questions by letting her know that the other two fellows either had outstanding grades and referrals or powerful connections, but she did not. In frustration she loses it and says something to the extent that she wants to be in the program because of her brains and not her beauty. Dr. House calmly asks why it is worse to gain success from one natural and physical thing (the body) than it is from another equally natural and physical thing (the brain).
People tend to have a problem when people use their body as a means to success, but somehow the mind is a clean and even good tool for success. But the mind can be a tool used just as arrogantly, just as flauntingly, just as wrongly, just as immorally as the body. However the mind somehow gets a free pass. We praise those who can destroy their enemies with point after point absolutely sending a tsunami of rhetorical chaos on an opponent; we love it, it is the sport arena of genius. If it is a free-style battle with beats in the back or a political debate on podiums, it is just as easy to send an audience lusting after the natural talents on display and fully exposed.
The mind, just as the body, can also be used for good things. It truly can be a way of success that is hard working and fascinating without being cut-throat or immoral. Just as a good body can be used for success without defying goodness.

Aside from frustration, Dr. Cameron had no retort to her boss’s question. We, like Dr. Cameron, have failed to see that the mind is just another gift, another thing that we can indeed cultivate but cannot take credit for. But we read, we think, we debate, we write, we expose ourselves to new things! But we do not make the mind work, we only work out the mind that was given us; we only flex the muscles of intellect that already exist.

Are you using your mind, or really anything that is in this world, to honor, to follow, to wonder, to gaze at the God who created it? It should be not surprise that the capabilities of the mind are so grand; why, because God made us to know him and he gave us a tool to begin to know how grand he is; he is the high sea and he gave us the boat to explore; he is the deep blue and gave us the SCUBA gear to glimpse his grandeur. It is hard to become arrogant about a gift given to us freely because the giving nullifies all credit or merit of reception to the one receiving. Friend, with your mind are you exploiting others or exploring the God who made it? Are you arrogant and rude or creative and helpful? Are you worshiping yourself with it or God?

Reason

Reason doesn't understand
the ways he makes with his hand,
the clever lever of his promised plan,
the garbage he makes of souls, others grand.
Reason is confounded, slack-jawed astounded,
confused, its guesses impounded
drooling with introspection
navigating the resurrection.
Reason too must bow,
dumb found in his heart.
Raising a toast lowers the steam
of cackled throats trying to sing.

Tell Us We Will Die Like Dogs

I lie. You lie. The underlying philosophy of the character Dr. Gregory House, played by the astonishingly American Brit Hugh Laurie, in Fox’s television show House is that every body lies. No one can be trusted because everyone always wants to do what is best ultimately for themselves whether it be because they want others to see their good behavior or because it makes them feel good, they have accomplished or done therefore they love themselves more. Well this is true: in the unreal reality of the television show House we can learn and wonder.

First I like to think, ‘I don’t lie, lying is for cowards and wimps.’ It IS for cowards and wimps and I, unfortunately, find myself swimming in that water. When we think of lying it is most often Richard Nixon, Michael Vick, and Enron type stuff. The big things. The costly things. But what about the insignificant, small and unimportant? When I find myself misplacing the truth and finding some falsity it is usually when I have no reason to. So maybe I added a for more yards to my career rushing in high school when I tell my kids, maybe the food wasn’t that good, maybe I wasn’t that excited when I saw him. Brad Paisley sings about bending the truth a little bit and he concludes—or at least whoever wrote the song—that bending the truth is love.

Why do we lie? The easy answer is that we’re liars and liars lie. But what is the point of telling a lie? As far as I can tell it is masquerading who we are or what we can do and projecting something more exciting and more appealing and impressive to those around us. We work on the micro level: we don’t need to lie on our taxes or lie to a whole nation, rather a small group of people who we can be more than. Of course, I’d never verbalize such a thing and that is mostly due to the fact that I do not see it that way . . . until I actually think about it and it becomes obvious. Why do we lie then? Maybe because we’re scared of what we are, who we are, and what we are capable of doing. We’re not satisfied with who we are in reality so we broadcast who we are fictionally to people who don’t know otherwise.

What’s so scary about who we are? We could be sitting in the execution chair if we had different parents, grew up in a different part of town, and hung around different people. The truth is we are capable of worse things than we cover our television with and that is frightening. This however is the wonderful news of Jesus dying on the Cross in the way he did then raising from the dead: our abilities, our identities are completely changed. When you entrust yourself to Jesus it is only when you realize you are the Father’s child, Jesus’ brother and friend and no longer who you were that you have no need of lying. If you are a follower of Jesus you have no need to alter reality. All that is truly helpful and good in the world already is with you and for you, the only reason you would lie is to impress nobodies who only exist to harm. Again, it is only out of a transformed heart that loves Jesus and his words and his life that one can live in absolute security in his identity: God loved us while we were still cheats and murderers, pedophiles, rapists, drunks, addicts, lesbian, arrogant, rude, hateful, and a liar.

A Prayer for Politics

Do politics scare you, maybe tick you off, or maybe they frustrate you? Me too. It baffles me that we vote for these people whom we have never had a cup of coffee with or even a handshake. I do not want to vote for a guy who gives a dead fish handshake, there are few things worse than shaking a hand that does not shake back! Regardless of sissy handshakes or rotten morals, we elect and they stand in between the unemployed or minimum waged and the president and the world for that matter. The people in Washington—that is DC not that the state, I was confused for awhile—are supposed to represent what I would vote for, root for the policies I’d root for, get angry at that dumb things I’d get angry over . . . well we all know that for the most part this does not happen. So when Presidents, Senators, House Representatives, Governors, Mayors, Chairmen, etc. act different than I’d like them to I want to bash them until I have no words left. I want to criticize them to anyone who will listen—this does not exclude inanimate objects or even unintelligent animate ones—in hopes, I guess, that I’ll feel better at the end by showing how logical I am and straight thinking I am. But does this help anything or anyone? I’d suggest no.

While it may be entertaining and make me feel better afterwards, I think it is an act of cowardly wickedness to react in such a way towards our elected leaders and here are my reasons:

Reason 1: They are people like you and me. This means two things: First, they are going to make mistakes just like you and me; Second, they are humans which means they are in some way beings that reflect the image of God. Lets take the first part of this—mistakes. While they should be more closely watched than the average guy—they are supposed to represent us after all—the result of watching something more closely is going to result in revulsion no matter what. One time I got a hold of one of those vanity mirrors that is more like a reflective microscope; I was terrified when I looked in it: it was like a planet of living hideousness was existing on my face, but I never would have noticed such filth if I did not zoom in. When we zoom in on people—yes, including yours truly—the result is going to be vomit inducing. The second thing—they’re made in God’s image—is more important because when we attack them personally we, in some measure, attack God himself. ‘No we don’t’ you may say to which I valiantly and sweepingly reply, ‘Yes we do.’ God created the physical body of someone as well as their brains which control mental development and reaction. I am speaking in very general terms here knowing that society and upbringing play a huge part in ones development.

Reason 2: Policies, for the most part are really what we despise. When I get ticked it is when so-and-so voted in favor of a dumb idea. Attack the plan, attack the soulless stupidity that is the ‘plan’ and not the people casting a yea or nay. Write your Congressmen about the plan and not how you wish he was not alive. People don’t mess up countries, policies and administrations do.

Reason 3: How would you do in their position? I know this is not a fair question, but I am still gonna use it. First of all, I read about as fast as a fifth grader so I know I’d lag behind on reading all the policies and suggestions, secondly I know I’d get torched by the resounding rhetoric and rules: I’d get my feelings hurt and go into a raging fit that’d headline CNN and Fox News. I also have the consistency of a wave on he ocean, which is not helpful when you’re supposed to be a rock. And finally, I have the ability to remember things like a ninety-year-old with Alzheimer’s, somehow I do not think this would be to my advantage.

Reason 4: I think I criticize because I am lazy: it is easy to yell and scream at someone who you know will not react or even hear you. I blow steam that they’ll never feel . . .and I kinda like this fact, which is wrong. I give them no chance because they do not even know I exist, yet I continue to butcher them like a piece of meat. Shameful.

Reason 5: I know that the God of the Bible is watching everything and is in control of all of it. For those who follow him we have nothing to be anxious about. Yes it is frustrating because I no longer live in the same country which my grandfathers—heck, even my father—were born in and I try and change what I can, but in the end I cannot be frustrated: God is working his plan, how can I hate that? ‘Sorrowful yet always rejoicing’ the Apostle Paul put it: sorrowful over the tragedies that are going on because we feel and are human and it hurts; rejoicing because there is a greater hope that is sure and coming soon, the kingdom of the risen Lord Jesus Christ.

So let us do ourselves a favor and maybe add a few years to our lives and when we turn on the news be a little less angry and frustrated because something bigger than taxes is going on in the world.

Thankful on Thursday

Thank you Jesus for your death,
the oozing blood & sacred breath.
For your nerves and your skin
bearing the bones & briars of sin.
For the salt and saliva you shed in shame;
your naked exposure & fallen fame;
the mocking murderers cheering your pain.
The breaking of the dance divine,
the dirge of duty & delight
dove into death
to save the wicked
and that was it.

Rising for the rebellious,
we regard your righteous worth,
a wreath upon the head which
was ashen and of dirt.

Healthy Much?

What’s with being super healthy? I know that I cannot live out my dream of eating candy all day long and hoping that the milk I dunk the Oreo’s in will balance off, but we have issues here in the West. At the expense of being genuinely happy: we count percentages, we say no to enjoyable foods, we work out way too much, we stand in front of many mirrors and step on scales, we feel bad when we’re not ‘in shape’ and the list goes on. I understand that there is a certain healthiness that is good (my candy life-style is bad, I know this), but what is the mostly Western psycho-healthy life-style good for?

Here are a few stabs at positive points:

1. Being pleasant to others. It is true, the saying ‘easy on the eyes’ did not come from nothing. But do you really sweat 4 times a week so that other people can look at you and not be horrified?

2. Being attractive to others. This is more like it. This is the reason that when you DO go for your run or weight-lifting that you have no sleeves or anything covering your tummy (well, for those who have something to show there; I’ll keep the mo-mo thank you). You want others to look at you and say, ‘oo-la-la.’ You also, like some animal, want to be made of the right stuff to attract a suitable mate. I said like some animal . . . that’s weird, I thought our brains set us apart . . . maybe our souls, regardless there are plenty of people who buck the number scale for attraction. Besides, there really is much more to a person than their looks (seriously, I’m banking on this one). Not that it is at all wrong to enjoy someone else’s beauty, especially your spouse’s, but one bad accident can change their physical physique: do you really want to base a marriage off of something as mutable as skin and bone structure?

3. Feeling good about yourself. Most of the time this phrase can be translated into ‘good self-esteem,’ which can equally be translated into ‘I like me,’ which can just as easily translate into ‘I’m arrogant and think I am the center of the world.’ When I look in front of the mirror and the shadows are right and it is just dark enough to be very visible I do not think good about myself, I feel great, I feel like I’m something special that the world has been missing for quite some time. What really IS good is more so feeling comfortable—without everyone else’s commentary—with yourself, regardless of how your body is shaped. Lie 3 exposed.

4. Live longer. This is good. I am not going to say that I want to die young and hope everyone else does too. Even the Bible speaks of long life as something positive. However, there is a big difference between hoping you live long and demanding it. People who are always in the gym and always watching what they eat seem to want to demand more life out of Life: look what I’ve done, give me days!! This is silly. What prevents us from dying when we are 20 or 120: not our choice. People who smoke a pack of cigarettes a day may live decades longer than the person who never ate a calorie more than he should have.

Ultimately we fear death. There is a sense in which this is not a bad thing at all. However when we fear death so much that we try and wield the reigns of life, there is something wrong. I am not a Fatalist or a disguised Fatalist (Realist), rather simply one who understands how the world turns and who really is in control of things. The Bible is very clear about this subject and there are three aspects:

A. The Ruler of this World. He is also called the Devil, Lucifer, the Prince of Darkness, the Father of Lies, the Deceiver, but he is also called the Ruler of this Present Age (of this World). When he tempted Jesus by telling the God-man he would give him authority over all the earth, it really was a temptation because the Devil DOES have the authority (thankfully Jesus is patient). In the book of Job (pronounced with a hard vowel sound like boat) the Devil inflicted Job with the death of family members, the loss of wealth, and personal hardship and physical suffering.

B. The God of the Bible. Read the Book, he’s all up in there. God is above the Devil, while the Devil does what he does on the earth God is telling and allowing him to do so—the Devil is leashed up. In the book of Job again we see that the Devil first had to ask permission of God to do the harmful things to Job and his family, God allowed them to happen. God even appoints the seemingly terrible things that happen in life: he even appointed that Jesus, his very own son, be unjustly murdered.

C. We are the final aspect. But some things do not make complete logical sense. I understand down to the most minute aspect how a seed grows into a tree and then produces fruit, but it still does not make sense. So too it is with our responsibility on earth. If you believe that the actions you take and do not take control the world (not in a dictator way, rather have an effect on the world) than you must have the most ulcers out of anyone. There is no way that you can believe this and still get up in the morning. If you think that the world will be tremendously effected by the decisions you make you would be crippled with anxiety because you know you will make a mistake that could kill someone and no one can live with that understanding all the time and not go crazy. You call it chance or fate or providence, regardless, you believe there is something other than your personal decision that dictates the flow of life. You know that you do not determine who gets cancer and who misses getting hit with a bullet when everyone around them does.

What does all this have to do with being overly healthy? When your health begins to dictate all you do and do not do it has already controlled you and you are bowing to a subservient master: you are being controlled by something other than God and even less than man. You cannot escape death, no one can. But you can laugh at the future knowing that eternity is in the hands of a God who loves you . . . unless you do not love him, then you should be afraid to die because if you die being a rebel towards God, you’ll be judged for it. However, like the All-State Insurance guy says, if your in God’s hands, your in good hands. And being in God’s hands means you can be a little less trim because you are worried about bigger things than what others will say; you can be a bit more round and not freak out that you will never attract a good spouse; you can know that your future is okay, ultimately. This is no license to be a glutton and not give a cent about your health, but put it where it needs to be, somewhere further down the list of priorities than it is. And go get some Dairy Queen, please.

Why are we Surprised?

Surprised. Surprised by what? You ever wonder why it is that people get surprised by anything? I’ve heard is said countless times: ‘Expect the unexpected;’ but even then you cannot control the reaction you sustain when something surprising happens.

The typical male American hero is a man not surprised by anything. When an explosion happens just behind the greased up and ripped dude, he doesn’t move a muscle. When people die he turns into an overly pragmatist with a touch of stoic realism: ‘people die, life happens,’ and he moves on,

Well we all know that the movie man is not real, we hurt when people die, we wet our pants when explosions happen, and on average, we’re ‘over-weight’ and not terribly good looking. We surprise fairly easy actually. Take, for example, the singer Susan Boyle. Susan was a contestant in Britain’s Got Talent, the British version of American Idle (really it is the other way around). The Scotswoman stepped onto the stage before a young audience wearing a 70ish stay-at-home-mom dress and overall she was not an externally captivating woman; however, as soon as she began to sing everybody’s jaw dropped and by the end she was met with a standing ovation and much praise from her judges. Why was the world shocked by this? Mainly it is because she looked like she fell off the boring bus 3 decades ago and has been lost ever since. Her demeanor projected a certain precedent but her abilities shattered that precedent: she did not fit her mold. This is the basic reason why we get shocked: when someone or something breaks out of its expected norm of behavior. Why are we shocked when a baby says momma for the first time? We’ve heard hundreds of people say momma, I can say momma and no one cares; it is that the baby was not supposed to say any coherent word yet. Guys, why are we surprised when ugly dude (2) lands a beautiful wife (10), because that is not how things are supposed to work, dude messed up the number scale.

Well here are some things to be shocked but not surprised by:

--People doing evil things to other people. You want evidence that people are generally bad, look at babies. You take something they want away they’ll scream, crap their pants, hit and refuse to eat until they get it. Why should we not be surprised; people are evil, we live under an actual curse where we want to and do . . . do wrong (somewhere 8th grade boys are giggling).

--People doing nice things to other people. Even though we’re all evil, we are still made in God’s image and though the mirror is broken we still got some pieces that rightly reflect who he is. So just because the lady at the store smiles and forgives you when you cuss at her baby who wont shut up, doesn’t mean she loves God, rather there are some things that she can let go.

--People claiming they’ve found complete contentment in life. Don’t trust `em, seriously. Life sucks, even in the bubble of the United States, and if someone says that they are okay with life they are either clinically crazy, so sheltered an infant would be shocked, or a cult leader. Granted people can have pockets of contentment, but seriously, keep one good eye on that person. The world is broken down and bleeding, we can laugh and cry; be happy and want to kill our self all in the same day: the world was not supposed to be this way. There is a difference between saying you’re content, living an island life-style throwing back margaritas and being content because you know that one day you get to push the ejection button out of this mess.

--People doing heroic things. There are plenty of principles people live by that are inches away from Christ, but, as the saying goes, a miss is as good as a mile. It takes something special to be brave, and not many have it. However we must remember that we can gain the whole world but still lose our soul.

--God being who he says he is. Hope you don’t miss this one. I get mad when people don’t answer me as soon as I like; I get overexcited when my team wins; I get the blues on occasion; I cry when I really hurt; I laugh at jokes; I have goals and desires and life will crush me, but I will not be surprised when I meet God. He will be much greater than I imagined, much more than I imagined and I’ll be surprised by that, but I will not be surprised that he is good, that he is full of justice, and that I’ll be pardoned of all my wrong simply because I believe that what Jesus did is true.

From the Preacher to the Preached: Unskilled

You’re on the Penthouse
holding a mojito
chirping articulate prose

They’re on the sidewalk
downing a Mad-dog
groaning unthinkable woes

John: the disciple whom Jesus Love

'The disciple whom Jesus loved.'

These words come from the Gospel according to John in the Christian New Testament. There is something you need to know about these words, the author of John kept writing them in his book. He keeps telling his audience that he is the one whom Jesus loved.

I remember when I first discovered this truth. How dare John, I thought to myself. Who is he to parade the words, who is he among Andrew, James, even Peter to claim that he is the one whom Jesus set his affection? When I would reread the Gospel of John I would continuously get angry at John, for I saw him as the most arrogant and obnoxious figure in the whole Bible. John is speaking these words and often, as he said presumptuously, ‘of course I am he who Jesus loved.’ I came to the conclusion that this guy was not going to be heaven, there apparently was not room enough for his ego, he thought that he was so great therefore God loved, that he must be some kind of special deal to God.

My judgments are all in the past because I could not have been further from the truth. Yes I realize now that I turned what John said completely on its head. The first time this phrasing occurs, in speaking of John, is found in chapter 13 of John’s book. Immediately prior to our phrase is something extraordinary. Jesus, whom John and 11 other guys had been following around the country and being taught by, said, ‘If you want to be great, be the servant of all.’ Jesus then took each of the twelve men’s callused and dirtied feet and one-by-one began to wash them using his own clothes as a rag and his own hands to hold their feet as he poured water over them and scrubbed them clean. They knew that Jesus was God. Jesus knew he was God. Yet, Jesus served them; Jesus was literally on his knees before them.

John heard the sermons that Jesus preached, he heard the stories Jesus told, he saw the way that Jesus lived day in and day out. John also saw how his life did not compare. John knew Jesus was right in saying that no one can ever be perfect just as God the Father is perfect. John was realizing more and more that he was a failure, that he needed help, he needed saving, his eternity was in trouble. Speeding ahead, Jesus is murdered and John and the others are scared and not too sure what to do, but then Jesus almost casually shows up in their house. He is alive, he beat death, he paid the penalty that John was to receive!

John knew how much he needed saving and now there was one who really could save his soul. Would that Savior reject him, wouldn’t he be annoyed with John’s sins? No! And this is why we find John saying over and over and over that he is the one whom Jesus loved. The repeated statement is not an exclusive statement that John is the only person Jesus loved, or even that John is the only disciple that Jesus loved. Rather, John cannot and should not get passed the fact that he could be and is loved by the perfect God and creator of all things. His song is simple and humble: ‘Do you realize that God loves me?! How can this be, I am not worthy, I am wicked. Yet it is true, God loves even me!’

What Was It?

I have the presence of something absent,
the wisps of dissipating veins,
a fog so subtle you cannot mark
when it is not.
When is a wave just a current?
A noise just a wind?
Is the ache of something standing
or something rightly ripped away?

Some Thoughts on Earth Day

Can I be honest? (I think I heard you say yes.) I do not believe that man has created the warming of the earth. Everyone knows Al Gore does not believe it either, just like we know that he did not invent the Internet. He is a businessman and a good one too; he helped create a world-wide scare that has produced billions of dollars worth of profit. I do not dislike the man for his endeavors, I think he's rather good, maybe ethically he could use some work but who is perfect.

The earth is pretty large, do we really think that we can have such a great impact on it, I mean humanism is one thing but dang. Besides, our options as far as 'going green' are more like 'going backwards:' all those batteries that last only 5 years in hybrid vehicles are made of highly toxic materials that are very harmful to the earth; the light bulbs that we have been demanded to use have more mercury in them than the planet of the same name; the wind and solar harnessors could keep a pot of water boiling for a year if they combined all their powers like captain planet's followers; besides, most things that are being done are replacing people with--AH!--robots and just like a person in the boom of the machines a century or so ago, I protest and say I wont wait around while computers take-away my job! Maybe the Terminator movies were not too far off.

I love the earth, but I do not worship it: I am a created thing and it is a created thing, God created us both. I do not mind leaving around a carbon footpath for others to follow me by, and I do not appreciate people telling me that I am destroying the earth.

As much as this present generation is for their 'rights' and speaking for the inanimate objects that they feel need a hearing, no one has considered the thoughts of the very things that we feel are unpleasantly 'suffering'--I cannot bear to rightly call a floating piece of ice something that is suffering. Did anyone think that perhaps the ice wants to melt. They have been up north for so long, why not visit the islands in water form? Who are we to demand that those chunks of ice stay in that one place, maybe they feel enslaved to the poles and want to get away, maybe they feel like they deserve a vacation, after all some of those things have been ripped off and used by photographers for a long time! And the polar bear; they may not like the cold. Maybe they decided that living up north was not so great, they cannot build nice igloos to live in after all. So maybe we--if we can positively say we are the responsible ones for the sometimes warming of our earth . . . which we cannot--are actually doing these guys a favor, think of the rights of those poor creatures for heaven's sake, can't they have a say?

Think of the irony of this whole environmental movement, it is a slow dictatorship snarling at most of us. I find it ironic that the shift to the earth and all its soulless creatures has, in large part, turned the world's focus off of the previously known as third-world countries and their people. In comparison to environment worshipers there are hardly any great humanitarian workers. Like the UN most people just sit around and go, 'This probably isn't right, someone should probably do something about that . . . but not me.' I do not want to destroy the earth, I am thankful for it, but I do not think I am, at least in the way most think I am.

In the end people do not want to save the earth, they want to save themselves, their reputation, their lives. Businesses bow to the green movement to their mockery because they do not want to lose business; angry and self righteous people--usually coupled together like that--pick up on the green movement so they can think they are better than all those brown-content killers! And they feel justified in calling us names and saying we are evil; the quiet, never-doing-much type is thrilled in joining a community of single-minded people, they can be apart of something 'real;' the guilty folks who never feel like they measure up join because they are extended some kind of hope for their lives; the people who really are concerned with the earth worship it most often. We humans are a mess, myself included and we need big-time help. Saving the earth will not save our souls; condemning others while we look 'better' only condemns our own selves.

Christ, who I follow, is one day going to--shield your eyes--destroy the earth. It is true! But he is going to make a new one that is much better. There will not be suffering and sin or Satan, only real peace worshiping God, the creator of this earth. The only way to be there in his joy is to realize that you are not perfect and have zero chance of being so and that you need a savior. Then believe in Christ, believe he is who he says he is and believe that he has done all that he has said he has done. He is the only one who can take away your guilt and shame; your sin and allow you to go joyfully head-long into your suffering; he alone can give you perfect righteousness before the all-seeing Judge. Which earth are you living for?

You Want Sugar in That?

Today, as in previous days, Americans are having ‘Tea Parties.” No, there is very little if any actual tea in these “parties,” rather they are waving around the same type of flags as were waved in America during the 1770s screaming to our spend-happy government, “Don’t tread on us.” Though I am very happy that no one is really having their life threatened because of this I wonder if the violence of the first Bostonian Tea Party was the main reason it succeeded. American’s are not what we use to be, that is for sure. For better, maybe for worse, but there is no tenacity, there is no resilience, just a whole lot of couch-shouting laziness. “But they are outside and it is raining!” That is exactly how it was some days during our Civil War . . . except they were being shot and they were starving and they did not have real homes to drive back to or new cloths to jump into. I am not at all trying to compare our Tea Parties with the Civil War but I am trying to convey that we are not them, we have a great heritage of Americans behind us but that does not automatically make us great.

Yesterday I was looking at another country whose government was being protested. Thailand is an aesthetically beautiful country but it‘s government is not. People protest against the government and they get killed. This is no rarity as far as the rest of the world is concerned, governments in the Americas, Europe, Africa, the Asian Regions all tout oppressive and aggressive governments. I am therefore aware of how nice it is to be able to go down to the Capital, say mean things to important people, and then go back home. But what would you do if this was not so? What if the American government started “sacking” people because they said something about the government that the government did not like? Friend, the reality of life is that nothing will stand forever, not even a fantastic government. Is your hope in the land that you live in, the people around you, the government over you? I know often my hope is, but think what a silly hope this is. Can the government save you from all diseases, they cannot save anyone from cancer. “But I know people who have gotten medical care” and that is a very helpful thing, but the government can only act as an aide, they cannot themselves go in and cure every one of its citizens, it is limited and it should be. There is only so much a government can do. Why put your hope in something else that has its own hands untied and yet is still unable to save and provide?

Yes, protest the buggers who are throwing money in the fire of their greed, but know that all the social change in the world cannot protect you from life, death, or eternity.

Friendship and Forgiveness

Friends are nice, forgiveness is better. I have truck-fulls of sinning experience. I have gotten angry at God and called him names; I have made up fantasies in my mind about people where they did or said mean things about me and I wanted them dead—all made in the factory of my imagination; I have specifically provoked people by doing things in front of them that I know is hurtful to them—not too dissimilar to a 3-year-old testing his parents words ‘no’; I have neglected to do things that I know, because God commands them, I should do . . . but openly decide they are dumb; I have put my hope in basketball and football; I sometimes worship food; I cuss; I drink alcohol; I smoke; I am arrogant and think I am better than you and lots of times feel like if I was the only person on the planet left, God just did a good thing.

I love my friends, and I’d do most anything for them, but forgiveness is better. When someone hurts me and sins against me I can forgive them; when I sin against them and hurt them, they, if they chose, can forgive me. What about God’s forgiveness towards sinful people such as my self-exposed . . . self? But forgiveness is not around to keep the world a better place. Forgiveness is around because we are and God is. Do you know that fundamentally when we sin against one another we are sinning against God? This is why friendliness—people-to-people--is different from forgiveness—God-to-people. How is it that when I wish my friend would die and that I could have his car I am sinning against God? Because every human is made in God’s very image, so when we transgress against one another we are declaring something about God: he is not worth respecting and loving. Look at David in the bible, the one who killed Goliath. He slept with another man’s wife, got her pregnant and then set-up and commanded the murder of her husband who was faithful to serving David as king and, as far as we know, faithful to his wife. Clearly the sin is against the man whom he killed, correct? Then why would David, from Psalm 51, in his confession of sin and repentance to God say, ‘against you, and you alone have I sinned?’ Friend, it is not that you just thought poorly of your friend or neighbor or the guy who just cut in front of you at Chick-fil-a, you have thought poorly of God in doing so. Our God-damning sins need God-pleading forgiveness. That is why God in Jesus Christ was damned, he willing claimed our sin and punishment as his own and was killed and separated from God his Father. Jesus, as the apostle Paul says, ‘became sin for us.’

I’ll still sin, probably before the sun goes down today I’ll have my own personal collection of new ones. Sure, I will forgive me friends, but there is nothing that can compare to forgiveness from God. The sins I have and will commit all are forgotten by God, for those who believe that Christ died for their sins. Rest assured, you will not be able to bear the weight of life until you have begged forgiveness from God, whom you have in all things transgressed against. God will never be forever lost by those who earnestly seek him.

A Reverse of Roles

It does not take long for one to find a place where our grandfathers and grandmothers are piled together. The ones who have money, or whose children have money, or are too bad off on the whole for anyone not to ignore find themselves in ‘homes.’ Some are apartments, some are townhouses, others are houses set on peaceful lots of land, though found in a gated community. While not vouching for all, most think that this is a suitable place for the elderly to pass their days: quiet, cared for, and under control with some company and the poor girl who has to coordinate all their events—BINGO and cards. There are in fact many who benefit from such a community: some need medical and physical attention that, quite frankly, their children cannot consistently provide. But what about the others? What about the mom and dad who just need help, but not a personal nurse, just a little help doing some things?

Our culture breeds frantic life. If we are not busy living, we’re busy dying. So long as the clock ticks, there is something productive to be done. The high-energy worldview is no place for the feeble. The Survival of the Fittest is well displayed in the business world we nurture. The young in this context are not just the future, they already are the present. There is no ‘out with the old and in with the new,’ for the old do not exist. My 12-year-old niece is better equipped for the business world than my grandparents. Technologies constant reformation makes obsolete the unlearned. Technology, it is obvious, is presently the greatest field of labor. So, in turn, the knowledge of the balding grey-heads is rendered obsolete as well. There is often a lure to treat the old as a child, ‘There, there; go eat your dinner at 4pm.’ It is true that often elderly people are a hassle, they take time, and they cannot do so much as us or to even help us with anything. But what does that say of what we value?

Christians are to think in different colors than society. Instead of basing ones worth on their productivity or perceived contributions to society, we see two things. First, though old and not what they once were, they are still humans, still created in the very image of God, still designed and able to reflect the glory of God with their life. Second, they are to be respected and to put some more stock behind the word respected, they are to be revered. The problem is not that old people’s bodies begin degrading, which we often equate with their value; rather, we devalue the valuable. We close our ears to wisdom thinking we always know more or at least best. The Bible teaches Christian’s to learn from the elderly, for in their long days they have gleaned much. They, in the Christian mind, are to be the pillars of society, the ones looked up to not down on. What about the burdens they bring? We are to love and nurture them as they loved and nurtured us as children—or as they were supposed to. We bear with their stroke-designed attitudes, we help them cut their food, we read to them when they cannot see, we walk with them and wait on them to finally get into the car: we help bear the burden that they own. The wisdom testified by their grey-hairs is to be desired more than a raise. The lessons they hold in their hearts are to be sought after more than reading our next novel. Their wisdom gives us years beyond what we’ve lived. Christian’s are meant to preserve and care for and love and revere those whom society stapled worthless.

'But'

Demonized domains darken the darkest darkness.
Schismed and severed, torn and tasteless;
ruthless is compassionate placed in here.
Satanized sanity screaming for suffering
all the torturous imaginations with unfeeling pain.
Consumptive chaos ordered to confirm
the lifeless existence set to burn.
Nerved shattered in the mornings of mourning moved past midnight.
The fighting and stomach dropping ache of sedimented souls
sorrowing after some sedated sound.
All the twisted dreams played out,
unspeakable agony voiced in muted moans.
Unwished for mutation of the mind;
destroying the destructed and taking their last breath.
The atoms scream ‘CEASE!’ to no relent.
Every moment births new heights of pain unbelievable.
Pricked, goes the life but not enough to kill
only to keep alive for Hell to fulfill.
Always on the fringes of fruitful death
but never to be reached by another step.
Left alive are the hopeless hearts gallowed in their own introspection.
The most terrible tragedies compare as a mouse,
small and soft compared to the lion who claws and gnaws.
Vomitous volcanoes of violence erupt, long ago
everything was given up.
The eye-less agonized groping for death, they see it will never be.

Ripping reality, righteous rays;
the glimpse of hope resurrecting the grave.
The husband haunts & hunts the evil in his rage.
Furious fire furrows his feet.
Anger towards the evil broods his sword.
He gathers those who hear;
The torture-bound dead.
Recompense for the rebel,
His own blood torn, his soul made rubble.
He pierces the darkness to claim what is his
He foolishes the world because their minds are eclipsed.

Helping or Hypocriting?

From the Gospel of Saint Matthew: Chapter 7 and verses 1-5


‘Judge not, that you be not judged . . .’ Jesus with this and the following verse is warning that when you look at another, see a fault, think about it, reason in your heart about that person’s fault, and conclude then pronounce--or point out--that they are in the wrong the same meticulous scrutiny that you put them under you will be put under. You can hear this a little better in verse two when Jesus uses the words ‘the measure you use,’ so by the rule of judging you used that very same rule will be used on you.
Are we never to come to someone, a brother perhaps in the faith, and point out when he is in the wrong? That is not what this text is saying, rather it is a call to help others but first examine yourself.

‘first take the log out of your own eye . . .’ It is easy to see the faults of others because they are in front of us and because the natural desire for humans is that we want to see fault in others because it helps us feel better about ourselves. Note the contrast between a speck--something very small--and a log--something very big and blatant. How foolish is it to have huge, noticeable, undealt with problems of your own and come to someone and point out something very small in themselves? And it is not as though you must be perfect before you help someone else out--too many say ‘oh but I am sinful, how can I help others’ this is foolish; was not Paul sinful, was not Peter sinful, is not your pastor sinful!--but rather you must examine yourself and ask are you out for the other--their good--or your personal gain?

‘You hypocrite . . . ’ Jesus rightly calls these people ‘hypocrites!’ What makes these log-lodged speck removers hypocrites? They care nothing of helping others and removing sin or bad habits, for they do not care about removing such things in their own lives, rather they would sit back in their false-sense of righteousness and say everyone else is a sinner: They care nothing of helping, only exposing others so that they themselves can feel righteous.

‘then you will see clearly to take the speck out . . .’ The aim is to help one another, but not sit back as a perfect and righteous judge condemning one another. We must be willing to say, brother, you are at fault here, but in humility and awareness that we too are very sinful. The key difference in the judging mentality versus the ‘me too’-helping mentality is that the ‘me too’-helping is done out of humility and love, and the judging is done out of arrogance and self-love. You cannot rightly help others and glorify God without first being humble--knowing you are not perfect and that you are just like them--and loving--wanting to see them be rid of their sin and vices.

What Are You Basing Your Life On?

We live in the Scientific Age. Well that is what the nerds call it anyway. I will confess, we have a great dependency on the very many new scientific findings including all the technology, which is considered science . . . unless it gets too arithmeticish, but even then it is still science. Okay, enough poking, we ARE in the Science Age. We want facts! Meteorologists, aside from religious people, are among the most disliked in our communities because they are so often wrong; we want to the truth not some 20% turned 100% in a matter of 30 minutes. We also love our scientific food facts: the calories, the myriads of fats, what is good and what is not. Facts, facts, facts!

Do you base the truth off of facts? What about God? Absolutes and religion muck-up science one might say. Well that is no answer, that is a deflection, surely we can be honest with this question. Although we live in the Age of Science, we come to depend on how we feel more than ever it seems. As my evolution friends might say, we are relying on our primal instincts. We do not roam the earth dwelling in caves with a club in one hand and the hair of a woman in the other, we’ve progressed . . . but which way?

We eat because we are hungry, not because we know by facts that we absolutely need food; we watch TV and stay on Facebook because we want to, not because it is proven to make our lives better; we make friends, we dump boring ones, we say this or that, we do almost everything because we want to, not because it is factually the most helpful, right?

Feeling are good, really good, but only when they are used appropriately. God gave humans feelings to be able to expound on facts: Your friend just had a successful surgery, it is good news and if you are not malfunctioning you should feel happiness! When you hear of someone you know is in a car wreck it is not good news and you will be sad. But sometimes our feelings do not comply with reality. What about when you receive fabulous news that your spouse actually does not have cancer . . . and you feel nothing. Or when you watch a movie and someone gets brutally murdered and you become happy. Feelings are odd and fickle.

So again I ask, are you trusting in facts? Are you trusting that reality is based upon your feeling your sense? Let me tell you that experience is not science. Experience in our culture is elevated too highly. Now of course I want the doctor who has been in the field for a long time to examine me--unless it is Greg House--, but what I mean is when you base your life on one or two outcomes that others seem to think is not right. We often throw in experience because it is fake science, it is a hoaxed closed observation. We want a result and if an experience appears to give us that result we champion it with 'Aha!'

Do you base the reality of God or his character off of feelings, about what you think, or do you know facts about God? What if the Bible’s facts about God being holy and just and being willing and promising that he will judge righteously those who do not live in obedience to him? Why should he have the right to be obeyed me us, you may ask? Because he made us, and he being the maker of us can tell us what to do. But he is no tyrant, he knows what is best for us. Are you basing God on some bad childhood experience; why not see for yourself who the Bible says God is, that is why it is in our language.

Are you simplistically living by what you feel is right and good? Friend you are then basing not only your entire life but what lies beyond death upon a very unsatisfactory method. Are you sure you are willing to be that certain of something so whimsical? Feelings fly in the face of faith, one may say; God and the reality of faith—an expectation not a crossing of the fingers—stands regardless of what we say about: it is. And it must be reckoned with now or later.

Who I Am

Dirty, dingy, corroded, gross!
Step away: don’t make contact: keep going.
Not the homeless hag hobbling in the hidden halls;
Not the loud drunk demanding the world’s dough;
Not even the helpless whore who’s high on hopeless;
But from the ‘just getting by’ and they’re serious.
The broken down car, no healthcare for their failing health,
The one blanket too few, the chairless table or the tableless chairs,
The maybe a new light bulb later, the leaky roof drooling on their collapsing floor.
I step away because I’ve forgotten that I
Was they and more: the homeless, prostitute, raging, poor.
I dodge the holy love–laced dart and leave the privileged of providing to other hearts

There Is Nothing That He Does Not See

‘The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good.’

Can you imagine that the Lord of the universe is watching everything that you do? You cannot go in the physical darkness of night or in a closed area without your actions being watched by him. There is no place on earth or in the heavens of which you are not exposed to the perceiving eyes of God. Even if you retreat to the deepest recesses of your heart, God is even looking at that for he knows your thoughts and the intentions of your heart.

Not only does God see and know, he will judge everyone for all their conduct! Friend, when you go to do your sins, know that God is watching you; when you devise schemes in your heart how will you will do this or that you must know that God is watching your heart; when you greedily and wrongfully desire things in your mind, know that God is watching your mind. God is everywhere and everywhere you think and intend and do, God is watching you. And as he watches he is keeping a record of all that you do against him, that which we call sin and disobedience towards God. Do your thoughts coincide with his will; he will judge you for them. You must know that when you die God will judge you for all that you have said and thought and intended but never did: nothing will be hidden but all will be exposed before him. When he rightly asks you, ‘Why did you not obey me, but instead do whatever your own heart desired?’ what will your response be, friend?

But for the Christian, the terror of God’s awful and accounting gaze is turned into something new altogether. Christians, those who do the will of God and strive to walk in obedience to his desires, are God’s children; being a good father God is very eager to com to their aid, to help them, to teach them, to discipline them so that they may love him better. The Christian knows that God is watching everything and nothing done against them by others will not eventually go unpunished. The Christian, and only the Christian, and live life in ease for he knows that God, his father who loves him deeply, is jealous to keep him protected and is watching him at all times.

Do you live in the fear or comfort of God’s gaze? Why are you so sure that you are God’s child? Do you know that your life is wicked right down to your very thoughts and intentions? Do you know that your life on earth and the hope of eternal life is hopeless apart from the completed work of Jesus Christ? Do you know that Jesus Christ was not raised from the dead his death would be worthless? Friend, God is watching, are you worshipping him or worshipping something else? He will one day bring up all your thoughts and actions and call you to account for the, Will you be able to say in truth, ‘But I have trusted in Christ, he has paid for all these wrongs’?

Are You Working for Nothing?

‘Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy?’

This is a great question to ask, but there are many confusing elements to it; How do I know if I am spending my money for bread, which is not really bread; How do I know what really satisfies; where do I find such things; what is this person talking about??

The fact of the matter is that the one speaking is talking to those who are spending their money on food, legitimate, physical, scrumptious meals! So the question put to them was strange to them as it is strange to you and I; as a result some of the same questions were perhaps forged in their own hearts just as in ours today. The obvious answer is, I am eating real bread, would you have me steal it, or are you suggesting that I not eat food? But the obvious answer is not the one the speaker is looking for. We get a better clue when he continues: ‘and your labor for that which does not satisfy?’

Well these words come from the mouth of a prophet in the Bible’s Old Testament, Isaiah is his name. His audience was the people of Israel, the people whom God had made into a nation and himself established. In the New Testament we find Jesus saying the same thing as Isaiah and to the same people: ‘Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.’ Jesus points out that work and labor is not an end in itself.

Friend, do you find that life itself is wearisome, that your days are spent toiling and working but to no lasting end? Why do you work so hard and live for a job that one-day you will retire from? Work is a good and right thing, but only when it is not done to give meaning to life. Rest, you will find, does not come in your seventies when you have retired, no rest can be found at any moment! Jesus says, ‘I will give you rest.’ That offer is for now and for eternity. We strive to succeed and aim at something—anything!—that we can imagine will satisfy us that will give us pleasant thoughts as we lay our heads down at night to sleep, but nothing less than Jesus Christ will give your soul rest--for it is your soul that has kept your mind and body weary and tired. You are unsettled because your conscience knows that there is a God who demands worship, yet you find yourself resisting him. Friend, you will not rest until you have given up and seen your own striving at satisfaction in everything but God as sin before God. Jesus did the work that was needed, he paid for our sins by being unjustly murdered.

Isaiah goes on to say, ‘Seek the LORD while he may yet be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the LORD, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.’ Do you find that you are sinful and on a smaller scale even your thoughts are evil? No one can say that they have never wrongly thought about someone--maybe wishing that person driving slowly in front of you never existed--or have always been 100 percent honest in every situation--maybe not all of your sources for your paper are actual sources--or have wrongly wished that someone else’s possessions belonged to you--like their income, their children, their spouse. Let us joyfully acknowledge our sin, no one except God has ever lived and was perfect. But go to God for he will have compassion and even though we have sinned against him he will abundantly pardon.

Are you laboring for things, which will not satisfy you? Are you doing everything except the one thing that will give you rest? As you lay down to sleep are you still laboring because something is awry? You are in a good place then, no one is perfect; go to God with your sin.

C’est la vie

‘C’est la vie, that’s life’ you may say. The loose phrase echoes the sentiment of an unaffected or undistracted person, too focused to be greatly hindered or even surprised by life. The death, the life, the triumph and the dismayed all are disregarded under the simple C’est la vie. But who, in all sincerity and meaning can actually say something of such flippancy when real, shaking, and arduous times avail our lives? To speak in such a way is either a symbol of insanity, lack of feeling, maybe even security and surety.
Insanity: It is conceivable that one is so locked in his own closet of despair that life is too tumultuous for him to come out and play in. The insane man is then able to throw around any phrase he likes, for nothing is of any real substance. He speaks and has as much flooding affects as one drop of water; his words stem from an inability to understand life aright any longer. His ability to see and compute the socially accepted—or humanly appropriated; the natural and normal—response. Therefore, at any moment he can say, ‘C’est la vie’ and mean it, but it means nothing.
Lack of feeling: There are those who feel nothing. We do not mean physical touch but rather emotional ‘touch.’ His mother who was nothing but kind to him unexpectedly dies and he is unaffected. His wife finds that she has finally been able to stiff-arm the long awaited pregnancy and no joy falls over him; thus at any moment he can say, ‘C’est la vie’ and mean it, but it means nothing.
Security: The world could implode and standing on its edges this man can rightly explain our phrase because he has an overwhelming confidence in something. Yes, he feels and yes he understands but still, overriding all things he feels secure. Now there are two possibilities in such security: something you perceive to be trustworthy or something that unequivocally is trustworthy. Many have trusted in their minds, their abilities, their race, their beliefs, their hopes, humanity, karma, good deeds, or fate. Others have searched for something outside themselves, for they know that there is something bigger, more grand than they can find inwardly or in their humanity. They understand that when they the towering mountains sprinkled with snow on its tips all hovering beneath a blanket of serine clouds majesty and awe is the natural reaction because they are in the presence of something greater than they. But these too fall short. Jesus Christ is the only thing that by his nature commands awe but also offers to be followed and to become like him. Sure, Nature seems to call and be natural but we cannot be Nature; we can be captivated by the Grand Canyon but we cannot become like it. Jesus shocked the universe by leaving heaven and becoming a human only so he could live perfectly and be betrayed by his closest friends and followers and killed for being innocent. He left glory to be rejected out of love for his father. And his father raised him from the dead and has given him authority over all the universe and time and that which lies beyond time: timeless eternity. Jesus’ heavenly father asked him to do this great chore so that the rest of humanity could become like him: without blame before the father.

Whimsical words will fall away when our time on earth is done. Our eyes will close one final time and will you have the confidence to say to yourself, ‘ah, C’est la vie?’